Content Warning

Greetings and Salutations.
Because my stories have bite, they can contain content that isn't suitable for work or children. Not a lot of truly graphic sex or violence, but there are some questionable or heated posts. F-bombs are not uncommon, so watch your footing.

Wednesday, January 16, 2019

Movie review - The Package

It's one thing to hear a movie is bad. It's another thing entirely to experience The Package. I could sum it all up with one sentence: A dick is funny, laugh at it.

Maybe as a couple minute sketch, the premise would be amusing. Anything longer than that, and you just repeat the gag with a different setup. Oh no, the penis fell out of the cooler....again. Someone has to touch the penis...again. How many times can you waggle a fake dick around until it becomes funny?

This movie wasn't actually vulgar or that funny at all. It might be funny if you were still in grade school and thought weewees were naughty. But how many adults are there that still find a penis funny simply because it's a penis?

It's almost worse than a fart joke. Sometimes those are funny because of the inappropriateness of the situation. Like farting during a eulogy.

But The Package was aiming even lower than that. This was like trying to get a laugh simply by saying fart.

There's also the bonus of friendship conflicts and drama, and relationship conflicts and drama, and a twin brother wanting to watch his twin sister get laid.

Just ridiculous, and terrible, and not worth your time. Unless you were so stoned you'd giggle at paint drying.